from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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