Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Randomize
