she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
