That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
