He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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