I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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