There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Bring me that man meat
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
