ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
