His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
