We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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