the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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