walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
