Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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