if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
