Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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