Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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