How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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