Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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