just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
