doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
