Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
