that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
