if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
