Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry what_wuz_that hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(949): View more from California

i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit

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(706): View more from Georgia

You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over

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(937): View more from Ohio

What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?

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(585): View more from New York

you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it

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(901): View more from Tennessee

If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong

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(613): View more from Ontario

I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.

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