I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize