Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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