No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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