We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
