Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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