I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
