i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
