I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
