p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
