He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Randomize
