How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
