chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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