Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
