Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
two words...techno handjob
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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