i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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