yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
that is very illegal...i love you.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
