They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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