Umm I'm too high to move.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize