she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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