Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
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