Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
