She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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