? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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