my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
