we have officially lost it.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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