ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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